Posted by
Kilroy on Wednesday, November 28, 2007 2:39:01 PM
INDEPENDENCE, IOWA - In what is the first and some would say most important major electoral event in American politics, latest polls show a surging Barack Obama to be developing a sizeable lead over Hillary Clinton in the up-coming Iowa Caucus. In a state that has broken many a candidates hopes for the nomination, Iowans have always prided themselves for setting the trend of how later primary battles shake out. Obama’s up-tick has analysts dubbing this the “
Wheel of Fortune Caucus” largely because of the reason for his popularity. Polls show that 70% of Iowa voters like the fact that "Obama" both starts and ends with a vowel, just like "Iowa". For waitress Peggy Sawyers, Iowa spells victory for Obama – “
Count me in for Obama! – I haven’t been this excited about a caucus since (Lee) Iacocca was rumored to run!” said Sawyers.
The emerging “Vowel Factor” seems to have narrowly averted the Constitutional crisis brought on by “The Oprah Factor”, a phenomenon brought to light by
NPR David Greene’s visit with Iowan Geri Punteney, ironically from Independence, Iowa. In the interview, a sobbing Punteney’s weepy support came along with her admission that, before Obama, "
I never had anyone pay attention to me and my needs — he, he held my hand." The NPR airing brought on an emergency session of the Supreme Court which was widely expected to rule in favor of rescinding women’s suffrage on the basis of the Punteney Syndrome: The deranged and irrational notion that the purpose of the office of the Presidency is to address the daily personal emotional needs of a citizenry suffering from arrested development. For now the Court is expected to table a ruling on the Punteney issue as not ripe for adjudication in light of the polls showing a slightly less asinine reason for the Obama surge.
