Posted by
Kilroy on Sunday, March 11, 2007 1:06:31 PM
WASHINGTON, DC- Announcing today that Washington, DC has been effectively surrounded and U.S. President George W. Bush has been isolated and is "
alone, in his bunker", a smiling Sen. Charles Schumer, (AQ-NY) called on any American troops still under arms to surrender immediately.
"To continue resistance at this late stage of the war is only sealing their fate", Schumer said.
When asked about the danger of continued fighting, Schumer was confident that, while some
"fanatical troops, out of a misplaced sense of loyalty to their so called Commander in Chief and Constitution", may continue attacks, most have been effectively neutralized by "The Murtha Plan".
"We've been choking off their ability to resupply and to bring in reinforcements for some time now, thanks to John", Schumer said, referring to Rep. John Murtha's, (AQ-PA) successful disruption of American supply lines.
Echoing Schumer's, confidence, Sen. John Kerry, (AQ-MA), declared that the days of ... "
young American soldiers ... going into the homes of Iraqis in the dead of night, terrorizing kids and children, you know, women", are over.
In other war news, Sen Dick Durbin (AQ-IL) announced the liberation of several "POW Camps" including one in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. Durbin, cited reports on the scene, "
describing what Americans had done to prisoners in their control, you would most certainly believe this must have been done by Nazis, Soviets in their gulags, or some mad regime — Pol Pot or others — that had no concern for human beings," It is expected that Durbin will be lead prosecutor for planned war crimes trials to be held in Havana, the nearby capitol city of coalition partner Cuba, in early 2009.
